The Odd Job Page 7

  Chapter 7

  I was surprised that no one bothered to stop Egg from entering the Grand Hall, until I noticed an area just inside the doors where a number of creatures were gathered. There were perches for a number of different flying creatures. One was easily the biggest crow I had ever seen. It was definitely a crow, of that I was certain, when it bunched up its feathers when it saw Egg. It was just about the size of a bald eagle and if Egg got any funny ideas, there would be feathers and scales flying. Close by was a large grey owl, and beside it was something that looked like a bat but it had a long reptilian tail with a tuft of fur at the end.

  We walked past the menagerie leaving Egg to take his place among them. Merrill and Belinde were waiting for us just a little further into the dining hall. Once again my breath caught in my chest at the sight Bel in her gown. Merrill had changed into a stylish black dress and heels and was looking very handsome herself. Visually, Merrill looked to be ten or fifteen years older than Belinde, but in this place one never knew. She was probably over a hundred and easily more attractive than any movie star of forty-five.

  "Are you ready to meet your new family, Mr. Aingeal?" Merrill asked, with a mischievous grin.

  "I have no idea, ma'am,” I said, mildly concerned. "There’s only one way to find out, I guess," I finished. Promising myself that I would make every effort to be as polite as humanly possible, I offered my arm to Belinde and nodded to Wellington. I was as ready as I was ever going to be. I just hoped I wouldn't say something that would get me turned into an ape or maybe a dung beetle.

  The four of us walked as a group towards the end of the dining hall where a massive table sat laden with place settings, center pieces, and numerous candelabras. High-backed chairs ringed the table. The guests were gathered between the table and the back wall near a long bar. Most of those mingling around the bar were chatting amiably with drinks in their hands or nearby on the bar-top. I was slightly surprised at the bar. It seemed more likely to belong in a large and expensive hotel, likely one that also housed a casino. Its location probably came down to a question of 'Where else would you put it?', like most of the oddities in The Estate.

  "Not everyone is in attendance this evening," Wellington informed us. "As a new Adjustor swears fealty to an Elder, that Elder gains status," Wellington continued. "Should that Elder hold a seat on the Ruling Council, they then become Head of the Council for the duration of that Adjustor's service." Wellington carried on like a history professor, obviously enjoying the role. "The last Head of the Council of Elders was the Elder Zeus, who along with his closest supporters and retainers of course, will not be attending tonight out of courtesy,” he finished as we approached a slender yet shapely woman of unearthly beauty.

  "Mr. Declan Aingeal, it is my honor to introduce you to the Lady and Elder God Aphrodite," Wellington stated formally as he bowed to the immortal. I followed Wellington in his bow, assuming it was the sensible thing to do. Introducing the elder as Lady first was, I suspected, was an indication of nobility. If I carried myself like a commoner being introduced to kings and queens, I might live through the night.

  "I am pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Aingeal," Aphrodite replied after she had noted the curtsies of both Merrill and Belinde with a nod of acceptance. "I did not expect you to be attending the dinner this evening with all that has transpired in your life today," Aphrodite said with genuine interest and a touch of concern.

  "I felt it wise that he should attend, Elder. With Romeo gone, there are none but the staff to train him and the assistance of the Elders would be most appreciated," Wellington offered in both explanation and well-crafted plea for assistance.

  Aphrodite thought for a moment then stepped across the small space separating us. In that one step she seemed to grow almost two feet. She then leaned forward bringing her lips to my ear. The motion brought the clamshell shaped fabric of her bodice toward my chin. My god, she had to be over seven feet tall and her ample cleavage was almost touching my face. I actually felt Belinde bristle beside me and my thoughts were suddenly full of Bel's inviting décolletage. Of course my thoughts were often full of Bel's inviting décolletage. Though quite possibly my undoing, I still had a preference for woman who would likely kill me.

  My thoughts were drawn back to the present by Aphrodite's whisper. "Would it be too much to ask a favor of you this evening?" she whispered in my ear. I gulped audibly.

  "If there is anything within my means that I can do to assist you Elder, I would be honored," I answered, silently praying that it was a mundane task and I hadn't embarrassed Wellington.

  "I will speak with you after dinner then," she finished. Turning to Wellington, the goddess said, "Romeo chose wisely. Should you have need of my assistance, you have it." Then stopping beside Belinde, she ran the back of a finger along the vampire’s regal Danish jaw line and down her neck before she stooped to whisper into Belinde's ear. Belinde blushed crimson and lowered her gaze. I would have been concerned if I hadn't seen her smiling with scandalized embarrassment.

  Aphrodite nodded to the group and floated away with delicate footsteps, once again seeming a normal human size and the embodiment of grace and beauty. The four of us were still slightly stunned by Aphrodite's parting smile, when two men ambled over to us. One of the men rested a hand lightly on Wellington's shoulder while the other came to stand between the two of us. "She sure has an effect, doesn't she?" the gentleman between us asked, more as a statement.

  Wellington, the first to recover, nodded warmly to the man on his left and patted the hand on his shoulder. Turning his attention to the more vocal gentleman between us he said, “She certainly does." After blinking a few times, Wellington cleared his throat and briskly straightened his tie. "Mr. Declan Aingeal," announced Wellington, "I would like to formerly introduce you to Bran the Blessed, Irish God of Health, Brother of Branwen and all around devilish practical joker,” he finished warmly as the gentleman between us turned slightly to offer a hand in greeting. I took the offered hand before I fully realized that I was shaking hands with a god.

  "This may be terribly inappropriate, but aren't you dead?" I asked. "I remember my father telling me a bedside story about your sister dying from a broken heart over your death," I confessed.

  "Oh I don't know about that,” he said, nonplussed, "she seemed fine to me just now." He chuckled as he gestured toward Aphrodite who was flirting with a very serious looking fellow in a three piece suit.

  "That's your sister?" I blurted, in question.

  "We have a lot of names," Bran replied in good humor. "This fine fellow,” he said, indicating the gentleman to Wellington's left, "might be my father, brother or son, depending on who you ask." He was obviously having fun. "Whether you call her Aphrodite, Branwen, or Airmid, she will always be my sister and she is very much alive," the amiable god finished with a wink.

  "You can call me Miach or Doc, as many around here do," said the gentleman to Wellington's left removed his hand from Wellington's shoulder to offer it in friendly greeting.

  "It's an honor to meet you, sir," I said, shaking his hand. I had remembered his name from my father's stories as well. "Son of Diancecht, right?" I asked.

  "Very good," he replied, "Though we're more like extended relatives." He nodded mischievously toward Bran. I chuckled and shook my head.

  "We're both healers, but this sot has all the skill in surgery while I concern myself with health in general," Bran offered proudly.

  "We were largely responsible for much of the work on the pantry," Miach boasted, casting a congratulatory wink in Bran's direction.

  “You both live at The Estate?” I asked.

  “I do,” Bran answered. “Miach is visiting from the Emerald Estate, where he is the senior healer in residence.”

  It was becoming clear that I had a lot to learn about who was who when it came to gods. These two seemed to be lifelong friends. It was obvious that they had a soft spot for Wellington by the warm way they treated him. Hopefully ever
yone I met tonight was as easygoing. I suddenly had doubts though, as I spotted a very large and very well-dressed man walking towards our group. If Smith was large, then this guy was extra large, maybe an XXL. He looked like he could hold his own at a monster truck rally, sans truck. He wore a fiendishly crisp and stylish three-piece suit and Italian leather shoes that had to have had titanium arch supports. He wore a full yet neatly trimmed beard and had a grand flowing mane of silvery grey hair.

  Every molecule in the air around me came to full attention as the imposing figure stepped in front of me. There was the slightest hint of blue light creeping out from under a few tiny spaces around the edge of a black leather patch covering his left eye. 'Balor One Eye.' I thought, once again remembering tales from my childhood.

  "Declan,” he said, addressing me by my first name as he came to a halt directly in front of me.

  Luckily I had been to meet Smith and Coach, had been transported twice and shaken hands with two elder gods already today. Without that to prepare me, I'd easily have wet myself on the spot. Every hair on my head felt like it was trying to hide and I would never have believed that anything capable of intelligent speech could be so entirely imposing. "You swear some very creative oaths, my boy," he said as he cracked a grin. He leaned forward slightly in a conspiratorial fashion and said, "My eye socket isn't actually empty."

  "I can explain that," I offered weakly. The elder god tipped his head back and laughed much like Smith, the clear difference being a measurement of decibels.

  "No need lad,” he said with genuine warmth, "I've held this office before and you do me an honor by returning me to it." He smiled and rested a huge meaty hand on my shoulder. Instead of having both my knees buckle from the weight of that giant hand, I felt lifted. My body and spirit suddenly infused with strength and I felt a vitality I hadn't remembered since my teens.

  "Let's get to the table before I drop from hunger," the elder god rumbled. "Given a chance, these youngsters will be gossiping over drink for hours," Odin said with a wink as he steered me to the first seat on the right from the head of the table. Stopping behind my chair, Wellington seated Belinde beside me.

  Bran and Miach took one last opportunity to brag about their accomplishments. "Wait until you try the bread!" Miach whispered excitedly. "The talent for the horn itself was actually my sister's work, but Miach and I did the food," Bran said with obvious pride. The two patted me on the back as they moved past and I received twin jolts of fortification to my being. I had a feeling I knew why everyone was resting their hands on Wellington. It was nice to know he was so well-cared for after what he'd been through.

  “They were responsible for the blessings on the raw ingredients,” Wellington whispered in my ear after seating Belinde, “not cooking it.”

  There was a tiny thunderclap and another imposing figure appeared across the table from me. His hair was much like Odin’s but a rich golden blonde and he was clean-shaven. "Please excuse my tardiness. I was helping Goibhniu with a project he is most excited for," the blonde giant said, addressing Odin. "With inspiration from our young friend here," he said with a nod in my direction, "Smith may have solved the problem of these damnable mortal weapons.” The immortal spoke with a slight bow in my direction. "Llyr and Lugh are still with him; I expect them shortly," the god I whom assumed must be Thor, finished then nodded curtly, as if he were giving a battlefield report.

  Odin seemed pleased. I glanced around the table noticing that most of the guests were still making their way to their seats. No one seemed to be in much of a rush. I figured that rushing must be more of a human trait as there just wasn't much point in rushing for an immortal. I could hear slight pops happening out of my field of vision as more guests transported directly to the hall. I still didn't know what that form of travel was called but I was looking forward to being taught. I had the shoes, so in theory I should be able to do it.

  I jumped slightly at a pop directly behind me. Another large meaty hand appeared on my shoulder along with the resulting surge of additional life-force. "You had some wonderful ideas, laddie," Smith said from behind me, leaning toward my ear. "You've already made me proud, boy. If you ever need my help, I'll be obliged,” he said with a wink as patted my shoulder again in parting and left to find his seat.

  "Thank you,” I said simply, feeling a brotherly connection to the big brute.

  Most everyone had managed to take their seats by this point. Seeing this, Odin rose slowly from his chair. A gnarled yet stout wooden staff suddenly appeared in Odin’s right hand and he used it to stamp out a pair of thunderous resonating taps against the floor followed shortly afterwards by a third thunderous stamp. The entire assembly rose from their seats as a staccato series of pops signaled the last arrivals.

  With everyone finally assembled, Odin spoke in a calm full voice that filled the entire hall, "We gather tonight in celebration and in mourning, as is always our way with a changing of the guard. We mourn the loss of our dear friend Romeo Pittacus and we celebrate his victory in once again finding us a worthy soul, stout of heart and spirit, to enrich our ranks."

  "Aye!" roared the salute of everyone at the massive table. I noticed that I was the only one not holding a drink and quickly grabbed the tankard resting at my place on the table. I managed to drink to the toast before the elder god resumed speaking.

  "I am very honored to find that once again I take seat at the head of the guard and find not one true heart sworn to me, but through him, two. I ask all of you to be kind and understanding with our young charge as he has been thrust into this new life without the decades of introduction usually afforded to a bearer of the mantle." Odin paused momentarily before resuming his speech. "We must, as a family, take up the responsibilities Romeo is unable to fulfill as he would have done for any of us. Even now I am told that this remarkable young man has aided Goibhniu in the creation of a new armor that will allow those of us susceptible to the mortal weapons to once again walk safely amongst man."

  A deafening cheer filled the hall as all eyes turned to me. Bel was beaming with pride, as was Smith who was now standing beside Thor. Smith was fluffed up like a peacock and looked close to tears. "Some of you suspected a delay but thanks to the stout heart and determination of Purcival, the ceremony will be held tonight as is our tradition. In a welcome break from tradition, the old guard will be joining us in support to greet the new adjustor, and assist in ushering him to his post." There was a moment of shocked silence that I honestly couldn't appreciate then another cheer and applause. At this point Odin took his seat and the assembly followed suit.

  A steady stream of beautiful young women began appearing with tray after tray of food for the table. Steaming platters were placed in front of me, one after the other. I had never seen so much delicious food at one time. In fact, the only time I had ever dined with as many people was an occasion where I had attended a Greek/Italian wedding. Hopefully this dinner didn’t end in the same kind of brawl/vomiting contest. Once the table was fully laden, one of the maidens took a place standing a half step back and to the left of each diner they would be attending throughout the meal.

  I felt a bit awkward having someone standing beside me while I ate, but said nothing. "You'll get used to our ways soon enough," Odin offered in a grandfatherly fashion. "You do the young ladies a service in allowing them the chance to serve out their penance,” he finished with a wink. "Please try something before one of those two bursts," he added with a snicker, pointing surreptitiously at Bran and Miach who were bouncing in their seats. I reached for a steaming bread roll and broke it open. The beauty at my left elbow leaned forward and retrieved a butter dish for me.

  After smearing a generous coating of butter on the roll, I took my first bite of food directly blessed and possibly prepared by gods. My eyes must have practically popped from my head. The butter was pure heaven. I had never even suspected that something as mundane as butter could be so rich and opulent. The bread I had dressed in that wondrous butter was tru
ly a marvel. I felt strength and vigor rushing into every fiber of my body. I wouldn't be spending much on vitamins after today was my thought as the first bite of food awakened a hunger in me that I hadn't suspected existed. I began ladling, forking and spooning food onto my plate as fast as my servant could switch trays.

  "Slow down, son. You'll have many more fine feasts such as this to enjoy in the days to come. It is our way to celebrate victories and I believe we shall see another soon," Odin counseled. I blushed red with embarrassment and stopped my shoveling. Odin winked at me knowingly and I smiled in relief as I began savoring the food on my plate. Each bite was such a delight that I wasn't sure if I should feel guilty or spoiled.

  A large grey wolf trotted behind Smith and Thor to rest at Odin’s side. Promptly, Odin selected a large slab of roast beef and passed it to the wolf on the end of a massive serving fork. The wolf waited patiently with the meat between its jaws while the elder selected another smaller morsel of food to place between the animal’s ears. "He'll carry that back to my bird," he said with amusement pointing toward the menagerie at the halls entrance. I leaned back in my chair to watch and sure enough the turkey sized crow leapt down from his perch to land on the back of the great grey wolf and seize its prize.

  One by one the familiars of those at the table were winging, slithering, bounding, trotting or hoping over to guests at the table for a treat. I was quite surprised to see Egg appear beside me, knowing that he was really a machine. "He's a living thing now, boy. Let him have a treat," Odin coaxed with a smile. What the hell did you feed a mechanical dragon? I wondered. As Egg draped his neck and head over my shoulder, I indicated one dish after another with no success. Egg suddenly trilled as my hand passed a large silver platter with a large silver pitcher of cream resting on it.

  I picked up the entire tray and handed it to Egg who gently took the edge of the platter in his mouth and backed carefully away. My attention was drawn from Egg as I heard a number of elders congratulating Smith on his work. Smith was following Egg's movements with a face splitting grin and boyish delight. "You've made a good friend there," Odin whispered to me, flicking a brief point of his ring finger toward Smith. "Your familiar was the first life he ever created and the poor boy was heartbroken when he thought he had failed." Odin confessed, his voice actually breaking slightly in emotion. "It is hard not to become a little callus and jaded over the centuries but Goibhniu never has. He wears his heart on his sleeve," Odin finished, shaking his head with the hint of a proud smile on his face.

  Conversations were taking place all around the table. Now and then the elder god, under whose patronage I now found myself, would lean toward me and point out a character at the table and explain a bit about them. Much like Aphrodite/, most of the elders at the table actually wore more than one mythical title. Odin himself was at once Balor, Dagda, and Odin. "I hope I'm not being offensive when I ask this, but what of your wife Freya?" I asked, sincerely hoping I wouldn't be turned into a frog. Odin smiled and answered.

  "Freya is part of the old guard. She has sworn fealty to Zeus and you will be meeting her tonight." My face reddened once again with embarrassment, I had finally stuck my foot in my mouth. Odin simply chuckled. "I believe I understand your concern but it is misplaced. We do not align ourselves with one another in some popularity contest or play for power." He frowned suddenly and that frown sent a shiver down my spine. "We leave that sort of childish behavior to the Sly." He took a healthy swig of ale from a tankard the size of a small beer keg. "We align ourselves, Declan, where we will be most useful."

  Odin stood and beckoned me to follow him to a large carving of a tree whose root complex covered most of the left wall. There was a moment of hush before the conversation around the table resumed. Odin reached out a hand in reverence and stroked the carving. I noticed one root in the carving stood out from the others. As I reached out my hand to touch the root, Odin cautioned, "Slowly, lad." I continued as he nodded in encouragement. When my fingers drew closer to the wood, I felt a curious tingling begin in my fingertips and race up my arm. I'd have stopped but the elder god nodded once again, coaxing me to continue.

  With each fraction of an inch that I drew closer to the elder wood, the unearthly sensation increased to the point where I had to struggle through the last remaining space to finally touch the root. As my fingers, then my palm came to rest upon the wood, I was filled with grace. I had never felt such peace and contentment in my life and wondered if this is what heaven felt like. That thought in itself was very taxing to form completely and I was forced to break contact with the tree in order to think. "He's in the tree isn't he? God is inside this tree," I asked, so sure in my belief that my question was more of a statement.

  Odin nodded, gravely with emotion. "We all sprang from the tree of life, the world tree Yggdrasil," he said, once again stroking the ancient wood reverently. "My father in his pain was forced to return to the tree for his own sake as well as yours. As promised, we returned to comfort mankind and provide what little guidance we were allowed under the pact." As the ruling head of the assembled gods spoke, I became aware of a crowd gathered at my back. Belinde had silently taken place beside me and I was aware of Egg's presence nearby.

  "There is much I would like to explain to you but simply cannot do so in mortal terms," Odin confessed. I nodded, agreeing whole-heartedly that there was a lot that I would rather not know. The Elder of Elders turned to face the great table with such an air of authority that I knew I wouldn't be finishing my dinner.

  "We shall assemble for the ceremony atop Yggdrasil. Close the keep and summon Heimdallr to guard the pass!" Odin decreed and the peal of a hunting horn rang through the hall as he once again tapped the floor with the mystical staff the moment it appeared in his hand. There was a flash of light that followed the expected thunder and I found myself along with the others in a mossy clearing. The sun was setting and as I marveled at the beauty of it, I noticed large boughs surrounding us and reaching upward towards the heavens. I realized with a start that the entire assembly and I were standing in a crook atop a massive tree of unimaginable scope. There was a ring of standing stones nearby that reminded me vaguely of Stonehenge.

  A hunter’s moon hung in the sky, half a compass point to the right of the evening sun. Stars were also visible in the sky and I thought it seemed odd that the sun, moon and stars were all visible at the same time. I never thought to ask or comment on the phenomena. Odin turned to his right and led the procession in the direction of the setting sun and towards the ancient henge.

  As we drew closer, I noticed a group waiting within the confines of the ring of stones. Near the entrance to the stones waited a woman that looked like a curious blend of a barbarian swordswoman and beauty contestant. When we were just a few yards away, she walked forward with an enchanting sway to embrace Odin. "Declan," Odin began, once more addressing me by my first name, "I would like you to meet my wife Freya."

  "It's an honor to meet you,” I said, glad that at least one thing I remembered from legend was accurate.

  "Your predecessor was a personal friend of mine,” she said in condolence. "I would like to offer my assistance should you ever need it," she offered with a regal nod.

  "Thank you, very much," I answered, the tips of my ears reddening with the attention.

  Freya smiled in approval and turned her attentions back to her husband as our entourage entered the ring of stone. Numerous figures dressed in ceremonial garb reminiscent of ancient Greece were assembled to welcome our arrival. Odin broke from his wife briefly to shake hands with a robustly bearded man in an outdated yet oddly appropriate fashion. They exchanged a few words before approaching me as a pair. Zeus himself stood before me and examined me with a sharp eye. "My brother tells me you had no knowledge of us except in legend before today?" he asked with unmistakable authority.

  Praying mentally that I wouldn't say the wrong thing, I finally decided to just speak simply from the heart and let the chips fall where they may. "Tha
t is true, sir,” I said past a lump of fear in my throat. "I only met Romeo today as I tried to save him from an attack." I looked down at my feet feeling fully responsible. "I failed," I added quietly.

  "I am told that you did manage to save him from the first attack and that were it not for those damnable weapons you humans are so fond of, you'd have succeeded entirely.”

  "That is true, sir," I said feeling sick with failure. "Romeo died in my arms. He didn't even ask for help. I didn't realize it at the time but he used last of his strength and breath to pass the Mantle to me and warn me that I would be in danger," I finished, lifting my gaze to look the powerful Elder God in the eyes.

  Zeus turned to Odin. "It is true then? We are at war?" he asked.

  "I'm afraid so," Odin answered. Zeus turned back to me once more in appraisal.

  "Your sponsor was a friend of mine, young sir. You honor his memory with your words,” he finished as he laid a hand on my shoulder and I once again felt the tremendous rush of life-force roar through my body. "Is it true that you slew the treacherous Sly that attacked my friend this very day?" he asked.

  "Yes Lord, I believe it was the same people that attacked us," I offered in reply. Zeus cracked a frightening grin and nodded before removing his hand from my shoulder and returning to speak briefly with his group.

  People were taking up positions all around me and I found myself hoping that someone would make sure I got into the right place before I made a fool of myself. Thankfully Odin himself steered me to a slightly raised stone platform at the very center of the ring and took up a place in front of me.

  "Not since the time of legends have the Sly dared to threaten us openly!" he began. "We have not performed the Ceremony of Guardianship for more than two millennia but once again we will do so today. I ask the Elders of the High Seat to step forward as we accept the oath of Declan Aingeal as he takes the office of Adjustor, and of his retainer Belinde Dagmar in her oaths of fealty to him and through him to us.

  Zeus stepped forward to stand at Odin’s right followed by an Egyptian god and a rubenesque yet startling beautiful woman clad in a green gown that mimicked forest greenery. "Declan Caen Aingeal," Odin began, "you have proven yourself worthy to accept the Mantle of Adjustor and serve this Fellowship of Elders. Do you swear fealty to me as your patron?" he asked.

  "Draw your sword, place it tip down to the earth and say, 'I do'”, someone whispered in my ear though no one was beside me.

  Drawing the sword Smith had given me earlier, I followed the advice in my ear. "I do swear,” I said once the tip had touched the ground between Odin and I.

  "Do you also swear to uphold the duties and trust of your sacred office to your very dying breath as did the brave man who brought you to us?" Odin asked solemnly.

  "I do so swear,” I said with conviction.

  "Then let us bestow upon you the title of Adjustor and lend blessing to the sacred Mantle you carry," Odin proclaimed. At these words the four gods each reached out a hand to touch fingertips to my head. My head was wreathed with unimaginable power as the four ruling elders bestowed their blessing upon me.

  The realization that my situation was very real, very bloody real was finally making its way through my shock-addled mind. 'What the hell was I doing here?' I asked myself. I figured that there was probably no turning back when I noticed an electric blue glow creeping down into my field of vision. The elders withdrew their touch from me and took a half step back.

  "From this moment forward, Declan Aingeal, you are our agent in the earthly realm of Midgard and its associated mortal realms," the elder god intoned.

  "Adjustor!" cheered the assembled gods. Well at least I was popular, or would be, until they figured out I was just a random idiot that was in the wrong place at the wrong time. There wasn't much point in worrying as Belinde would probably kill me in my sleep later tonight anyway.

  I noticed a presence at my side and wasn't surprised to find Bel standing beside me. I was curious to see what would happen with Belinde. I figured that with all the talk about her being my ‘retainer’, it would be different and thankfully that fact was taking my mind off my own situation.

  "Belinde Mary Dagmar,” Odin intoned, "do you swear fealty to Adjustor Declan Aingeal and to the Office of the Adjustor?" Odin asked with solemn gravity.

  "I do so swear," Belinde said with conviction.

  "Kneel before your Lord and accept your role as retainer to the Office of the Adjustor," Odin instructed. Belinda lifted the hem of her gown and knelt in front of me. She placed a hand on my sword just above the crosspiece and as directed by Odin, I placed my left hand on the back of her head. I was careful not to mess her hair, I knew there would be hell to pay later if I did.

  "Repeat with me the blessing." Odin instructed as he stood sagely before me. "I accept you, Belinde Mary Dagmar, as my personal retainer," the elder boomed and I repeated his words. "I accept you as well into the Office of the Adjustor as a retainer to that office." Once again I repeated his booming words. "I bestow upon you the Mantle of Adjustor, as is my right, and call upon you to share my burden. Do you accept this sacred duty?" I repeated the words, sincerely hoping that Bel would accept. I was scared shitless of what might lie ahead and not too proud to admit that it would be damn handy to have someone with vampire strength around when shit went sideways.

  "I accept your burden and will gladly share your duties," Belinde paused for just a moment. She then added in the barest whisper, "I will die before I fail you." I was so out-classed. I wanted so badly at that moment to kiss her. The girl was oozing regal charm to the point that I felt like a total fraud.

  "So be it," Odin said softly as the air around us became still.

  "So be it," I repeated, hoping I was supposed to repeat this last part as well. An electric blue glow spread from between my fingers then sank into Belinde's crown. I heard a sniffle behind me and turned to see Smith dabbing at the corner of his eye with a handkerchief the size of a small tablecloth. I made a mental note to trick Smith into watching at least one Harry Potter movie with me.

  "Rise and stand Adjustor," Odin boomed proudly. Bel rose to her feet with the help of my hand and stood proudly beside me. I felt like we were having our prom picture taken. But to be honest, I also felt proud. Even though the ceremony had seemed a bit dramatic, as most ceremonies tend to, it felt right and for the first time in my life I felt like I was part of something that mattered. I had no idea how Belinde had been pulled into this affair anymore than I understood how I had been selected. However selfish the thought it might be, I was glad to have her with me.

  The woman in green and the Egyptian god stepped down from the platform and resumed their places. The sun had set during the ceremony and a new moon had risen beside the one that had been visible to the right of the sun when we arrived. Tapping his staff again in a slightly different pattern, the elder god waited for each resulting peal of thunder to die before tapping again. Zeus, who had never left the platform, stepped forward to stand beside Odin.

  "My fellow gods," Zeus began, as Odin chanted under his breath in some long forgotten tongue, "lend us your strength as we forge the shield of guardianship for our champions."

  A glow began to infuse the ring of stones and every being gathered within. Wellington was suddenly loosening and removing my tie. I didn't resist his actions, trusting that he knew what was happening to a much greater degree than I did. He quickly unbuttoned the top four buttons of my shirt and left with my tie rolled up in his hand. A feminine hand appeared from my right and grasped my wrist, sweeping my sword and arm to my left and up above my head then lowering it slightly to allow Belinde to grasp the handle with me. The same person, I believe it was Freya, took my left hand and placed it upon my breastbone. Out of the corner of my eye I saw that it was indeed Freya who was assisting when she placed Bel's right hand in the same fashion.

  Everything was silent for a moment while I assume Freya resumed her position among the others. Then, without warning
, lightning began arching from the stones and striking the blade of my sword. Bolt after bolt of vermillion with a familiar electric blue at its core arced blindingly off the surrounding stone to strike the blade until I thought it would melt in my hand. Strangely enough, it was my left hand that was heating up. Bel gave a soft squeak beside me but didn't flinch. Then as quickly as it had begun, the barrage of lightning ended. Many figures standing in the ring around us slumped or sagged noticeably from the effort.

  Beside me Belinde released a sigh of relief. Personally, I wasn't moving. I was scared to remove my hand from my chest because I expected to see a smoking crater the size of an ashtray. It wasn't until both Odin and Zeus were making 'Lemme see' gestures that I finally dropped my hand. Looking down, I was delighted to find my chest intact. I’d made it this far in life without ever getting tattooed so I wasn't quite sure how I should feel about the artwork stenciled into my living flesh. In the center of my chest stood the Celtic triquetra; its outer edge was gilded in gold, while the inner area was a deep sapphire with a maze of Celtic knots and scrollwork depicted in silver.

  I turned to Belinde and saw her examining the same symbol on her chest. Bel's triquetra was slightly smaller with an outer edge of silver. The basic color scheme was the same with the exception of the gold and silver being reversed. The metallic coloring didn't appear to be pigment and though it flexed like the skin it was now part of, it did appear to be actual metal.

  "Now you are protected against the talents of the Sly. Though they are fallen," Odin advised, "many of the Sly retain some godlike power.” The elder let those words hang as a caution on the perfidious nature and power of the enemy. These people, gods, I corrected myself, were putting an awful lot of trust in a couple of office workers. They really got screwed in contract negotiations.

  Many of the assembled gods were making their way forward to congratulate either Belinde or myself. Some were congratulating us both as if we were a married couple. 'Ha' I laughed at myself, I should be so lucky! I would crawl over a half mile of barbed wire and broken glass just to go on a half decent date with Belinde. But in truth, I was a year off thirty, there was nothing remarkable about me at all, and my hair was thinning already. She could easily do better. There was no point in fooling myself about our relationship, I thought, as I turned and almost fell over Egg.

  The little dragon was arching his neck drastically and tilting his head to one side to look at his chest. There, dead center on his breastbone was a small triquetra. Three loops of gold bordered on each side by a band of silver.

  Smith suddenly pointed at the little dragon and roared with laughter. The giant’s contagious laughter drew the attention of others. "Ha!" barked Odin, a wide grin splitting his face from ear to ear. "This is indeed a fortuitous omen, three Adjustors at once!"

  "Indeed," agreed Zeus, "the time of legends has returned."