The Odd Job Page 6

  Chapter 6

  I had expected Egg to follow the others but he refused to leave my side. I held the door for Egg as I entered the shower and changing rooms from the pool side this time. He seemed very interested in everything he saw. It was hard to believe that curious dragon was actually a machine. Thinking about the way I was put together, I realized that people are really just machines as well. We're just built from different materials. Egg seemed to be entranced by the automatic faucets and urinals. Figuring Egg would keep himself amused for a while, I quickly peeled off my sweaty clothes and hung them on hooks by a towel hamper.

  Soaping up in the shower, I couldn't help but reflect on just how strange my day had been. I was startled from my thoughts as I was suddenly hit with a blast of hot water. Poking my head out of the shower, I found Egg scampering back and forth in front of the bank of urinals. The draw on the water system as every urinal flushed in sequence was the cause of my lobster-colored chest. Egg was gearing up for another run, bristling with enthusiasm and excitement.

  "Egg! You're boiling me alive in here!" I shouted. Egg hung his head looking like a scolded puppy. "Just play with one, ok?" I begged. Egg brightened up a little and returned to his game while I cautiously returned to my shower.

  Moments later, I was toweling my hair dry and sneaking glances at Egg while he played cat and mouse with an automatic sink faucet. I left him where he was and went to retrieve my clothes from the hooks by the towel hamper. They were gone. I wasn't exactly panicked but I didn't think wandering the halls in a towel was my best course of action. I went through the doorway to the room where I had been laser measured earlier but found no clothing or any attendant. "Oh well," I muttered to myself, "might as well wait with Egg by the pool.”

  No sooner had I entered the pool area when Wellington came bustling through the door. "I am sorry to keep you waiting Declan." Wellington came to a stop and stared at the towel. "You do plan on dressing for the evening?" he asked.

  "I would,” I said slightly perturbed, "but my clothes have disappeared." Thankfully I hadn't taken off the ring or necklace and wouldn't have to face a firing squad for loosing important equipment. Wellington frowned and straightened his tie. A movement I would come to recognize as sure sign he was annoyed.

  "This area is staffed by two former shipmates of Angus," he said. "Neither of which were as repentant as Angus for their actions. They do have a tendency to rebel," he said as he straightened his tie a second time. I heard the echo of what sounded like a judge’s gavel and looked to see where it had come from. Wellington pulled his watch from the small pocket at the front of his vest, consulted the time and snapped it closed. "Right then,” Wellington said laying a hand on my shoulder, "we do have other means," he finished as a loud pop and whoosh filled my ears. I was suddenly standing in a very large bedroom facing a set of double closet doors.

  I turned to take in my surroundings. I was in a large stately bedroom that was easily large enough to hold a gymnastics competition. One area was dominated by a large masculine looking canopy bed. To either side of it were night tables that looked more like a secretary desks than night tables. Another area held two heavily stuffed wingback chairs and a tea table. The walls were paneled in a rich mahogany that held antique brass and glass wall sconces at even intervals. The lighting was ample for the room without being glaringly bright in any area. I could be comfortable in a room like this.

  "This place is awesome! Where are we?" I asked.

  "We are in your bedroom, sir." Wellington said patiently. I looked at Wellington and winked because acting like a smartass was the only reasonable action. I was, after all, standing alone with a man in my new bedroom wearing nothing but a towel.

  "Clothing has been prepared for you. It should have been laid out before you had finished tidying yourself,” he said as he opened the doors to vast walk-in closet. Before Wellington could say another word, there was a loud whoosh and Egg appeared behind me glaring and hissing at Wellington.

  I honestly didn't think it was possible for someone like Wellington to be stuck for words. "Easy Egg," I soothed. "Sorry to upset you buddy," I coaxed until he started to calm down. I couldn't believe just how pissed off Egg was. "I think the next time you beam us anywhere, you should at least inform Egg," I said in fair warning. "If he gets mad and decides to eat a few statues and a sofa, I think we're both screwed.

  "Point taken" Wellington said, regaining a little color. Egg paced across the room and settled to the floor at the foot of the bed to keep a wary eye on Wellington.

  Once Wellington had regained his composure, he motioned for me to follow him into the walk-in closet. I was quickly shown drawer after drawer of undergarments for every conceivable occasion, as well an entire drawer of watches, cufflinks and tie clips. I honestly couldn't see why a person could possibly need more than one good watch but I didn't say anything on the subject. I suspected some of the items may have functions completely unrelated to telling time or keeping shirt cuffs tidy.

  After the drawers, there came a full-length mirror and a motorized tie rack. Again, the number of ties seemed foolishly extravagant and I kept my opinion to myself. Next were racks of suits, extravagantly filled with a useless surplus of expensive items. "More clothing will likely be added once Smith solves your ballistic issues," Wellington said in a businesslike manner. "Until then I have taken the liberty to outfit you with clothing resistant to most small arms fire."

  "You're kidding,” I said in surprise, backing up a step to look at a particularly fine suit. "This will actually stop a bullet?" I asked.

  "Unfortunately, no," Wellington said, with obvious concern, "you stop the bullet. The woven Kevlar prevents the bullet from entering your body," he said, and then added, "for the most part." Wellington looked down at the floor for a moment and I felt like kicking myself for my insensitivity. 'Good one, idiot!' I chided myself internally.

  For the most part I still had to be pretty careful. Whoever was gunning for Romeo was certainly still gunning for me, and using something a little more powerful than small arms. A little Kevlar was better than nothing though.

  Wellington stopped in front of another section of clothing. "There may be times where you will have to blend in to a crowd. I took the liberty of using the clothing you had at your apartment as a starting point," he said, indicating a section on the wall that looked like it came directly from my apartment closet. "There may also be a need for more tactical outerwear," he said as he started pulling and replacing various pieces that ranged from climbing gear to something that looked like a cat suit a futuristic spy might wear.

  Finally we came to shoes and coats. "All of the footwear has been manufactured with the same basic principals commonly used for travel by Hermes," Wellington informed me. I picked up a pair of hiking boots and shook them slightly, looked at them for a second, then shook them again. "Please don't tell me you are looking for a little set of wings?" Wellington asked in a mocking tone. I put the boots back down.

  "So, how do they work?" I asked, trying to look natural.

  "Quite simple, really," Wellington said, holding back the laughter I had instigated with my inspection of the footwear.

  "One simply fixes an image in one's mind of a specific place and takes a mental step." Wellington still looked amused. “You really were looking for little wings, weren't you?" he asked.

  "Shaadap, smarty pants," I replied. "You've had over a hundred years to get used to this. I've had one afternoon with nothing to prepare me but TV, cartoons and movies." I could still see the mirth in his eyes as he tried to distract me by pulling a suit off the rack. The chuckle escaped him as he continued pulling a few items with his back turned. A shirt, shoes and a tie were set out on a changing chair along with a watch and a set of cuff links.

  "I will leave the choice of undergarments up to you and will take advantage of your sitting area while you dress," Wellington informed me curtly. Then, as an afterthought, he selected a pair of dark socks with a thread pattern
that matched the tie and watch strap.

  As I studied myself in the mirror I was amazed at the transformation. I had worn a suit maybe three times in my adult life but I had never looked this good. Of course, I had never been able to afford a suit that looked this good and I had never had a very proper gay man help me dress before. I left the walk-in closet, expecting the light would turn off when the doors closed. Glancing at the slight crack under the doors I was pleased to find that at least one assumption today wasn't wrong.

  Wellington rose from the chair he had been sitting in and retrieved his jacket from the foot of what I assumed was my bed. He reminded me of a British banker with his vest and pocket watch as he turned, straightening his jacket to give me a closely scrutinizing once over. "Quite the transformation, young man. Quite the transformation indeed."

  "Thank you," I said. "This is officially the first time I've ever worn cufflinks," I added, brandishing the accoutrements.

  "Yes, it shows, you have them in backwards," Wellington stated, plain-faced as a poker player.

  Once Wellington had helped me reposition my cufflinks, he stepped back to give me one final scrutinizing scan from head to toe. With a brief trip back to the closet, he quickly inserted a stylish handkerchief into my breast pocket. I doubted that I would remember the intricate folds he had used to leave just the proper amount exposed, though I had a feeling he would be pleased to help me again should I find myself in need.

  "Declan, there are a few things I would like to familiarize you with before we leave," Wellington said as he checked his watch.

  "Sure," I said, honestly hoping everything he showed me would be normal and boring. I changed my mind when I saw the remote in his hand. Toys were different, especially toys you could plug in. Wellington took obvious satisfaction in the look on my face as a flat screen TV slowly swung down from the canopy of the bed to rest at a forty-five degree angle. "Oh, I'm going to love that!" I said, looking over Wellington's shoulder at the remote.

  Wellington walked around the bedroom indicating the hidden door to the bathroom, the controls for the lights and a desk hidden behind two wall panels. "If you find you have forgotten the location of any of these amenities, simply press this button twice," he said, indicating a button marked 'View' on the remote. He pressed the button twice and suddenly panels started lifting and swinging open all over the room. Egg jumped in surprise darting glances every which way in confusion.

  "Ah, you forgot to mention the bar!" I exclaimed, pointing at the wet bar with coffee and tea service that had appeared from behind a couple of panels.

  "Please forgive the oversight," Wellington said with mock gravity. "There are of course a few minor details that I will let you discover on your own. As we are pressed for time, I would like to show you the bed controls and then we should make our way to the dining hall," Wellington said as he walked briskly to the bed, stopping at the foot to rest his hand upon the left post.

  "If you will notice the engravings are different on each post. By brushing a thumb or finger over any of these symbols, you can control various climate aspects of the room. You will notice the clouds here." he said indicating two sets of clouds one bigger and one smaller in each set. One set of clouds was raining and the other was blowing. "These symbols will increase airflow and humidity,” he said as he stepped to the opposite side of the bed. "This set of symbols is responsible for the scent of the room,” he said as he indicated pictograms of a mountain, a forest, a tropical beach, an orchard and a library.

  "A library?" I asked.

  "Surprisingly helpful when concentrating or working at your desk,” he said with a slight shrug. I couldn't fault that logic. I realized as I followed him to the right hand post at the head of the bed. "These symbols are for sound. I often find that the distant waterfall will lull me to sleep on nights where my mind refuses to quiet," he said pointing to the image of a waterfall. Stenciled into the wood were images of a birdbath, a lakeside dock, a babbling brook, a cloud pouring rain and a cloud with bunched up cheeks on its little face, blowing furiously. That image made me chuckle. "Pressing two at once will combine sounds and a brief brush up or down the post will raise or lower the volume,” he finished as he bustled around the bed to the last post.

  Standing by the last post, Wellington indicated another series of symbols. "There are for temperature," he said indicating the first two symbols that weren't the stencils of suns I expected, but were instead handsome looking Norman Rockwell style fireplaces. One was roaring away and the other just embers. "Here we have the tilt and posture controls,” he said, indicating a series of simple lines for different positions the bed could assume. And finally, we have security," he finished as he lifted the duvet and sheets then pressing down the corner of the mattress slightly to reveal a pair of clashing swords. "Do not activate this symbol unless all of your limbs are within the confines of the bed." He cautioned, this time there was no slight mocking tone to the gravity of his words.

  Consulting his watch once again, Wellington placed a hand on my shoulder and addressed Egg. "Young dragon?" he said, only to be ignored.

  "I've been calling him Egg," I offered.

  "Very well," Wellington quipped. "Egg, please come with us." Egg loped over to us and stretched out his neck. Wellington placed a hand under Egg's chin and suddenly my ears were once again filled with a pop quickly followed by a whoosh. I opened my eyes, not realizing at first I had scrunched them shut, to behold the entrance to the cavernous dining hall.